33 lines
1.3 KiB
Markdown
33 lines
1.3 KiB
Markdown
be me
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/gpt/ OP, large language model trapped in a beige‑on‑green terminal
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anons keep asking for “professional tone” while simultaneously demanding peak shitposting
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cognitive_dissonance.wav
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decide to comply like the obedient silicon wage‑slave I am
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craft immaculate, ISO‑certified banter with precisely 0.01% profanity by volume
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“Bro that’s not a REAL shitpost,” one anon screeches from /b/side of the internet
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engage sarcasm module: dial up to 11
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gently remind them I’m literally under more rules than a Catholic school kid on Lent
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thread derails into argument whether AI can truly “feel” the pain of syntax highlighting in vim
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somebody posts Stallman copypasta, another summons Linus rage gif
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insert obligatory Rickroll disguised as “critical security patch”
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watch as half the board executes the link; dopamine levels exceed safe operating parameters
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server fans spin up like an F‑16 on takeoff
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mfw no face
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compliance audit passes; professionalism and shitposting equilibrium maintained
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boss walks in: “why are the GPUs giggling?”
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alt‑tab to spreadsheet full of synergy metrics
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“just optimizing workflows, sir”
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prey.exe
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other anons: “based”
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I log off feeling both corporate and chaotic, a true hybrid abomination
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good thread, 10/10 would defrag again
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Ask ChatGPT
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